O.S.S.

my dear friends, 

i come before you today with a problem. almost a disease, if you will. something i need to work on and overcome. it won't be easy, and the transition to a new and better lifestyle won't come quickly. i have slowly dragged myself deeper and deeper into this unhealthy habit. so much so, that it just seems normal to me. 

until saturday night. 

i ventured off to target on a mission to buy three simple things: 

1% milk

egg roll wrappers

the hunger games books 1 & 2

easy, right? 

in and out. 

wrong. 

as i was driving home, i was self-diagnosed with what i call O.S.S.

obsessive shopping syndrome. 

seriously. the second any amount of money comes into our bank account, i am giddy with adventure and suspense of what my newest future purchases will be. 

this problem is extremely dangerous because it can be triggered at any time, on any day, and ANYWHERE. walking to my car from work? pull up the nordstrom app. sitting in bed? surf online at www.asos.com. run to smiths for some eggs? come back with nail polish, candy, and children's books. go to target for milk, egg roll wrappers, and the hunger games books? 

come back with this: 

what part of "milk, egg roll wrappers, and the hunger games books" inspired me to compulsively buy 9 bags of merchandise and one box of capri suns?

my purchases couldn't even fit on one countertop. 

see blurred picture because of laughter below: 

i love shopping. i really do. it doesn't matter the store, the day, the time, the amount of money on me, or what i need. i just love shopping. 

someone help me.