gram b

this is gram b.
she has about 20 other names... helen, constance, connie, grandma barnes, etc. sometimes i forget which one is the real deal.

a few weeks ago, gram b got diagnosed with pancreatic cancer. saying it is scary is an understatement. pancreatic cancer is when a tumor grows in the pancreas (go figure), and in most cases by the time the tumor is found it is already huge. the person doesnt know its there until its bad. she is already in stage 4 of cancer... not a good sign. but let me tell you something- this woman is more cheerful than anyone i know!

this past week before i came home from college, my family made a detour to idaho falls to visit gram b. i'll admit i was a little scared to see her... but the trip was great. i feel like i got to know her so much better in the past few days. my respect for her has skyrocketed.
one day, while my mom and dad were running errands, tanner and i took the video camera and sat down on the couch with gram b to interview her. it was amazing. i cant even think of the right words to describe. it was fun and interesting and i was on the edge of my seat the whole time! we asked such a huge range of questions. from "whats your favorite color" to "how did you meet grandpa" to "did you go to prom in high school"
awesome experience.
by the end, all three of us were bawling (me tanner and gram). she is so cool. we asked her what she thought when she found out she had cancer... and she straight up bore her testimony to tanner and me and said that she had been so blessed in her life so far, and if this is what God wanted her to go through next then she would. she has the best attitude anyone could possibly have in her situation. i tried to put myself in her shoes and i couldnt. i dont know what i would be thinking? i'd probably be mad at the whole world.
but she is so happy. she is hopeful. she's my hero.


  1. Ash,

    That's a great tribute to your Grandmother. Thank you. She's my hero too.

    Love you and am so glad you're home!


  2. This made me cry. What a sweet lady and what great grandkids she has. That is priceless that you and Tanner took the time to video her. What a treasure that will be to everyone who knows her when she is gone. I want to be like her when my time comes too. It's fun to read your blog and FB. You are such a cute fun girl, just like your mom!